Thursday, September 24, 2015

We have a choice

“Mindfulness is simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).” – James Baraz

We have a choice, a choice to be free, to be peaceful and to hand over all our worries. A recent struggle allowed me to find this balance. It was a soulful surrender to the declaration of "I don't know." I think I know what I want, I want to know what's happening each future minute, and I want to know how it will all end up. Truth is I don't know anything. The Universe puts me exactly where I am supposed to be, every minute of every day and the realization is I don't know where or what this is. This is called living in the present moment and being mindful that what ever life throws at me whether good or bad I have a choice in how to respond. This is the only (I repeat - the only) attribute I have total control over. I can't make the sun shine for my birthday party, I cannot make a person like me, I cannot bring back a deceased parent. The point is I cannot control or change anything that universally happens. 

For example I received a letter in the mail informing me of the loss of a fairly large sum of money. I cannot change that I have "just" lost it, what I can do is pause, breath, invite a Power greater than myself to guide me into doing the next right thing - this we call action. Action is the place where my anger tends to arise. It is not merely the loss of money that I become resentful at, but the fact that I must act to fix or "handle" the situation. When I let go of how it all is supposed to look like, I can then and only then bring myself to the present moment, accept what is and then take action to make the most of the situation. Back to the letter - my next right thing was to write an appeal letter and hand deliver it to the office requested. At the time of arrival and date stamp of receipt I was told that it will take 75 days to process. Still I have no control. I just do the next right thing. 

The quote as written above mentions fear, and fear is what drives all these crazy monkey thoughts we have in which we think we can change the past or that by worrying about it will make it look different. I have learned that it doesn't work this way. I choose today to be happy, joyous and free and when I find myself in worry that happiness, joy and freedom is immediately taken from me - by my own choice! 

So today I invite you to handle each situation as it arises, if it is unpleasant be mindful not to worry about the results, but only focus fully and in complete presence on how to do the next right thing. Try this for a week and see how you feel. If it doesn't work for you, you can always go back to doing it the old way. 

Namaste

7 comments:

  1. this is a great reminder. I love the saying "That your life is none of your business". I just need to keep letting go and keep showing up and stay mindful : )

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    1. Bill - thank you! I wholeheartedly agree. Once I learned that to let go meant to accept, I was able to look at it from a completely different perspective. A recent conversation I had with a dear friend who was stuck in the "just needed to" reminded me that, accepting that I wasn't ready to let go, was just as important. At times we want to make it all go away, but to be present to the pain and discomfort that unpleasant circumstances make us feel allows us to begin the observation process - of acceptance. I find that if I sit with the feeling rather than try to let it go, it will disappear into acceptance.

      Thank you again for your comment. Much Love.

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  2. I am going to take the challenge and choose to be present. Doing the right thing isn't the hard part, not getting worked up is the challenge for me ;-). ~Rae Hodge

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    1. Rae - Congratulations on taking action! I have a suggestion to add to your challenge, just for today, when you notice yourself getting worked up, do the 3-part breathing exercise.

      Lie down on your back and place your hands next to your side. Begin taking a deep breath and then follow the parts below, remembering to be present and aware of the air in each step.

      Part 1 - Be aware of the air filling your belly
      Part 2 - Be aware of the air filling your lungs
      Part 3 - Be aware of the air allowing your chest to rise

      Then exhale fully without effort. Repeat 3 times.

      This will allow you to regain the present moment which the breath offers us. You will then be able to tackle the circumstance with clear focus and strength.

      Love you,
      Erin

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  3. This inspired me to push forward and do something that I fully have faith in. Even though people surrounding me are not in favor of this, I'd go and start my relationship coaching with and online coaching site. I don't care if they say it's a waste of money, but I'll give livecoach a try.

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  4. Dear Waynebrooks,

    Yes. Yes. Yes! Being open and willing is a huge step. Try it and learn. This is an investment in yourself. Be true to you. Explore. Breathe consciously everyday and begin learning how your mind works, only then can we learn what to change. Much love!

    Erin

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